I love the dress so much, I bought some corduroy to make another one soon!
Thursday, November 12, 2009
More Photowhoring....
One of the things I do look forward to doing once my job ends is having time to sew more. I recently did some sewing. It sort of happened by accident. I know, that sounds crazy. How do you sew "by accident"? Well, it all started when I went to Hancock Fabrics to get some ribbon for a baby blanket I had knit for a pregnant friend/co-worker. I happened to be wandering around and lusting after all the fabrics when I ran across some denim. And it was on sale. I thought I could find a cute skirt pattern to make to wear with my new boots. But instead I found a cute dress pattern. So I bought the pattern and the material. The denim was on sale, and the whole dress cost me around $25, including thread and other notions. Cool, huh? I mean, sure I could have gotten a dress from Goodwill or the Durham Rescue Mission Thrift Store for something like $4, but I have a brand new dress for $25 and unless some other soul happens to pick the same pattern and the very same fabric, I have a one-of-a-kind dress! So here it is. I wore it to church the other Sunday and made Gerald take pictures of me before I took it off.
I love the dress so much, I bought some corduroy to make another one soon!
I love the dress so much, I bought some corduroy to make another one soon!
Thursday, October 29, 2009
And then some bad news.....
It seems that for every plus, there's a minus... for every up, there's a down. Well, for the second (or third, depending on how you count it) time this year, I am being laid off from a job. Yep, you heard it correctly, my friends. The word came down today.
How can that happen, you ask? It's because of the Merck/Schering-Plough merger. I don't know how many I explained this to, but here it is in a nutshell. I work for ClinForce as a contractor for SP doing clinical data indexing. Because of the merger, the whole SP ClinDoc unit is being let go. That includes some really fine folks I met up in New Jersey. There had been a lot of worry up there, and I suppose rightfully so. I was told that of the 2, SP has the more sophisticated clinical documentation department. Merck just farms theirs out. Because Merck is holding the upper hand here, they call the shots and we're all unemployed as of 12/31/09. That's a total of 15 folks here in NC and about 60 or so up in NJ. Of course, that's a small part of SP folks that will eventually be let go, no doubt.
I have some prospects, and I am tentatively developing a plan. I have to believe that God is in control here and He knows what He's doing. I just have to trust and be attentive to hear Him. The job at ClinForce was ideal because I am getting ready to do an internship in Spring semester that I am hopeful will lead to a permanent clinical position, ideally as a CRA. That's out the window now, but worst case scenario (or maybe best case) is I draw unemployment while I do the internship and then try my best to get a full-time clinical job. I hate to be this mysterious and secretive, but I honestly believe that sometimes there are forces that work against you if you reveal too much too soon.
All I ask is that you all pray for the best, especially in regards to the outcome of the pending sale of the house. Having that cushion will be a true blessing.
How can that happen, you ask? It's because of the Merck/Schering-Plough merger. I don't know how many I explained this to, but here it is in a nutshell. I work for ClinForce as a contractor for SP doing clinical data indexing. Because of the merger, the whole SP ClinDoc unit is being let go. That includes some really fine folks I met up in New Jersey. There had been a lot of worry up there, and I suppose rightfully so. I was told that of the 2, SP has the more sophisticated clinical documentation department. Merck just farms theirs out. Because Merck is holding the upper hand here, they call the shots and we're all unemployed as of 12/31/09. That's a total of 15 folks here in NC and about 60 or so up in NJ. Of course, that's a small part of SP folks that will eventually be let go, no doubt.
I have some prospects, and I am tentatively developing a plan. I have to believe that God is in control here and He knows what He's doing. I just have to trust and be attentive to hear Him. The job at ClinForce was ideal because I am getting ready to do an internship in Spring semester that I am hopeful will lead to a permanent clinical position, ideally as a CRA. That's out the window now, but worst case scenario (or maybe best case) is I draw unemployment while I do the internship and then try my best to get a full-time clinical job. I hate to be this mysterious and secretive, but I honestly believe that sometimes there are forces that work against you if you reveal too much too soon.
All I ask is that you all pray for the best, especially in regards to the outcome of the pending sale of the house. Having that cushion will be a true blessing.
Tentative good news.....
Just a quick post. I have an offer on the house in Oxford - one that I can live with at least (and in this economy, that's a really good thing). Signed the contract on Monday. Scheduled to close on Nov. 30th. It sure would be a nice Christmas present. So cross your fingers, pray, do whatever it is you do.... I sure could use this turn of good fortune. It will allow me to be able to complete an internship in the Spring semester without having to sweat the lost wages so much. And I hope the internship will lead to a permanent clinical job. I sure plan it that way!
Just one more thing I'm thankful for......
Just one more thing I'm thankful for......
Tuesday, October 27, 2009
Wanna See Something Shocking?!?
I can't believe how times flies between my posts, but such is my crazy life. And sometimes I hate to bore the rest of the world with what sometimes seems like minor changes. So I'd rather save it for the major stuff. And boy is it major these days!
This is me pre-op and 25 days post-op. Already a world of difference. But no way did I dream of what was to come....
To begin with, let me tell you a little story. Back in the Spring of 2007 I think it was, Gerald and I decided to go hiking one sunny afternoon. We decided to start at Highway 50 at Falls Lake and hike through the trails - it's part of the Mountains to the Sea Trail - over to Highway 98. So we left a car, had enough food and water, etc., etc. Mind you, this hike according to Gerald was to be about 2-3 miles. I thought, "No sweat. I got this." As it turns out, the hike was more like 8 MILES! But the thing that struck me the most was that I was about to die about 2 miles into this thing. Granted, at some point I realized that the 2 miles was buffoonery and we were going much farther than that, but at most I thought maybe 5. That aside though, I was pretty darn surprised at how hard that hike was on me. The trail was not rough really - no more so than others locally. There weren't steep inclines or declines. Just regular trail. You know. Once we got to the car, I could hardly keep going. But later, boy did I pay for that hike. I was in so much pain and I could hardly move the next day! I know I was morbidly obese, but I was in shape for a fat girl.
Fast forward to this past weekend. On Sunday, Gerald and I decided to hike Penny's Bend Nature Preserve out by our house. Can I say how COOL it is that we have trails so close to our house? If you've never hiked Penny's Bend, you should - this time of year it is so beautiful walking beside the Eno River among beautiful fall leaves. At times, truly breathtaking. Penny's Bend is owned and maintained by UNC. If you're interested, go here: Penny's Bend. It was a 2.25 mile hike round trip, and we threw in a little geocaching for good measure. And I hate to admit to the World Wide Web - probably because I'm the last to realize this - but I am a geek. I actually like geocaching though I have been adamant to Gerald that I wouldn't. Ok, so I'm a geek. A geek who according to some (I don't know the source) said, "I use a multi-billion dollar global satellite system to hunt for Tupperware in the woods." Most appropriate, but WAY more fun! We found 3 caches at Penny's Bend. Here I am with the swag from the cache that I actually found. (Gerald always beats me to them!)
And the other thing about this trip was that the hike was nothing! Let me say it again. No-thing. Didn't phase me at all. I didn't get winded, my feet didn't hurt, etc., etc., etc. I was amazed at how easy it was in the grand scheme of things. I did have a little soreness late that night when I went to bed, but by the morning I felt fine and was ready to go.
And then I saw the picture Gerald took of me and thought, "Wow, that doesn't suck." So now I'm afraid I may turn into a camera whore. I'm actually ok with that. So when we got home, I decided to try on some smaller jeans since one picture Gerald took of me hiking shows that the legs of my size 12 jeans looked baggy. Hard to fathom, but there it was in digital image technicolor. Who knew? Even though my hair looked atrocious and I had it pinned back from the hike, I still tried on those jeans. Can you say - Size 10, Babee!!!!! Holy crap! I couldn't believe it either! So here we have it - living proof. And just for comparison, I am including a composite picture of me from pre-op/25 days post-op. The comparison blows my mind. Seriously, I had shied away from having pictures of me taken during the last few months, and now I don't hate them anymore!
This is me pre-op and 25 days post-op. Already a world of difference. But no way did I dream of what was to come....
It is SO hard for me to believe that is the same woman in those before and after pictures. And look, I grew collarbones! I knew I had arrived when I could see those!
This new life STILL blows my mind. WLS saved my life. Specifically, Dr. Dennis Smith (I love that man!) and the Duodenal Switch saved my life - And it gave me a better one!
Oh yeah, and I'm only 4 pounds from my doctor's goal weight for me. Tomorrow will be my 9 month post-op anniversary. I can't think of a better way to have spent the last 9 months of my life. And I'm not done losing. I know Size 8s are in my future, but if I never lost another pound, I'd be so thankful I had the duodenal switch. My journey has been relatively easy compared to some, and it sure as hell beats the prison of obesity I lived in for more years that I care to count.
Sure puts a whole new meaning on Thanksgiving for me this year. Tell me, what are YOU thankful for?
Monday, August 10, 2009
OMG! What a weekend!
Well, I didn't exactly make it a week of posts last week, but I am being more consistent here at least. I hate to bore everyone when I have nothing useful to say. I know some of you are probably wondering why I talk at all then! LOL
So one thing I have been trying to focus more on is quality of life goals - focusing on those things that I used to be able to do that morbid obesity took from me. The premise being that I can take my mind off the scale and the lack of movement there. Seriously. Been stuck there for 3 weeks now, and even gained 2 pounds last week. But that's what I get for eating Thai, Korean, and Chinese all in a span of 4 days. Lesson learned.
But that list consists of such things as riding a roller coaster again.... of going sky-diving.... of water skiing again.... of learning to scuba dive.... things such as these. Think of it as sort of pseudo-Bucket List. Things such as these are what WLS folks call non-scale victories. Wearing a smaller size of clothing is just icing on the cake. I already wrote about kicking the last of the BP meds last week. This weekend, I was able to check one of those items off my list.
Yes, that's right boys and girls, I water-skied. For the first time in almost 20 years I was able to get up on a pair of water skis. In fact, I was able to get up on the first try, and I stayed up until I told David to drop me by the shoreline. (BTW, a big shout-out to David Hall - he is a co-worker and friend of my brother-in-law, Todd. Now I can say that both David and his lovely fiancee' Heather as well as his parents are now friends of mine and Gerald. Wonderful, generous, sweet people.) And David knows how to pull folks on skis. He was completely calm and reassuring so I didn't have any fear of falling and embarrassing myself. If I fell, so what? I'd try again. But I didn't. David and Heather as spotter let me know when I was coming into some choppy water so I was able to keep my knees bent properly. I could go on and on.....
But the most important part of this whole story is that I felt FREE. Free from the bonds of morbid obesity and the ravages it had on my body. Free to do anything I want. Free to live my life to the fullest! I can't describe the feeling. I got a little teary-eyed then, and even now when I think about it. If you've never lived with the daily pain of morbid obesity and the toll it takes on your body, count yourself very fortunate indeed. And for any folks out there who may be reading this, especially those of you who don't know me personally, if you are living in that prison, let me say it again, you can be free, too!
Words can't describe how good it felt yesterday to move my arms and feel the soreness in my shoulders. Yes, it felt good! I hate we don't have pictures to share, but we will, next time! Yes, there WILL be a next time! But there is no way that next time will feel half as good as realizing a personal victory such as this.
Hope you have a great week! Go out and have your own personal victory, whatever form it takes. Now that's living.........
So one thing I have been trying to focus more on is quality of life goals - focusing on those things that I used to be able to do that morbid obesity took from me. The premise being that I can take my mind off the scale and the lack of movement there. Seriously. Been stuck there for 3 weeks now, and even gained 2 pounds last week. But that's what I get for eating Thai, Korean, and Chinese all in a span of 4 days. Lesson learned.
But that list consists of such things as riding a roller coaster again.... of going sky-diving.... of water skiing again.... of learning to scuba dive.... things such as these. Think of it as sort of pseudo-Bucket List. Things such as these are what WLS folks call non-scale victories. Wearing a smaller size of clothing is just icing on the cake. I already wrote about kicking the last of the BP meds last week. This weekend, I was able to check one of those items off my list.
Yes, that's right boys and girls, I water-skied. For the first time in almost 20 years I was able to get up on a pair of water skis. In fact, I was able to get up on the first try, and I stayed up until I told David to drop me by the shoreline. (BTW, a big shout-out to David Hall - he is a co-worker and friend of my brother-in-law, Todd. Now I can say that both David and his lovely fiancee' Heather as well as his parents are now friends of mine and Gerald. Wonderful, generous, sweet people.) And David knows how to pull folks on skis. He was completely calm and reassuring so I didn't have any fear of falling and embarrassing myself. If I fell, so what? I'd try again. But I didn't. David and Heather as spotter let me know when I was coming into some choppy water so I was able to keep my knees bent properly. I could go on and on.....
But the most important part of this whole story is that I felt FREE. Free from the bonds of morbid obesity and the ravages it had on my body. Free to do anything I want. Free to live my life to the fullest! I can't describe the feeling. I got a little teary-eyed then, and even now when I think about it. If you've never lived with the daily pain of morbid obesity and the toll it takes on your body, count yourself very fortunate indeed. And for any folks out there who may be reading this, especially those of you who don't know me personally, if you are living in that prison, let me say it again, you can be free, too!
Words can't describe how good it felt yesterday to move my arms and feel the soreness in my shoulders. Yes, it felt good! I hate we don't have pictures to share, but we will, next time! Yes, there WILL be a next time! But there is no way that next time will feel half as good as realizing a personal victory such as this.
Hope you have a great week! Go out and have your own personal victory, whatever form it takes. Now that's living.........
Tuesday, August 4, 2009
What? 2 posts in 2 days?!?!?!
A few weeks ago, I was having bouts of dizziness, especially when I stood up or sat up. I remembered (thankfully) that the cardiologist that cleared me for surgery said to watch for those symptoms when it became time to get off the Norvasc. I was placed on it several years ago because I was always having tachycardia. Stressed much? And not just from carrying around an extra 170 pounds.....
I went to see my PCP's PA, and she did some orthostatic BP measurements sp see what was going on. I was certainly symptomatic. She did a test run to see if I could come off the Norvasc. I went back a week later, and lo and behold, I can finally completely kick the BP meds. That was the last one since I came off the other one that day of surgery. I really am excited!! My BP was 112/68 the last time I took it. And to think that 6 short months ago, my BP was constantly around 150/90, and was becoming more and more uncontrollable. The cardiologist even mentioned increasing my dose of Norvasc before surgery, though that was not necessary as it turns out.
So I really am excited about the quality of life improvements that I have now. I can sit on the couch and bend over until my chest touches my knees and tie my shoes while still continuing to breathe normally. I can do the same while painting my toes. I can get down in the floor and get right back up with ease. No grunting or feeling like my knees are going to explode. Heck, the other day I squatted down in Mom's yard and stayed like that for a minute or so while I tried to get her neurotic dog to stop barking. Not only would I have not done that before surgery, if I had, I'd have not been able to stay like that more than a few seconds.
Now that the scale seems to move a little slower, I'm doing a couple of things to keep my head sane. First, I'm staying off the scales. Second, I'm trying to focus on those QoL improvements that give me non-scale victories. And I'm staying accountable with my eating - protein first! We haven't started our running program yet, but I am hopeful that my back will calm down enough that I can try it in the next few days. I have an appt to see the spine doc in September, but may get in sooner if it continues to bother me. I'm basically having sharp, shooting pains down my left leg and in my lower left back. They come and go very quickly, but it paralyzes me while it's happening. I think I may need to have it injected again. But, the one thing I am doing is reading a book called ChiRunning by Danny Dreyer. And out of that, I have come to realize that Tai Chi can help me gain core strength, flexibility and relax all at the same time. So to that end, G and I are going to start going to some Tai Chi classes at the downtown Y starting tomorrow night. I'm pretty excited about it. I'm just anxious to get back out and do some running since I can't help but think it will feel a lot different now that I've lost a whole Paris Hilton.
So that's where my head, and weight, is now. I am doing well, felling really good most days. I still struggle with eating too fast, and it still hurts when I do. But oddly, I am glad it still works that way, and I hope and pray it always will. Lots of folks tell me I'm looking younger, but at the same time are wary I'll be offended. No way will I ever get upset to hear I look younger! It'd be different if I didn't go into it knowing I made a drastic life change, yanno? Heck, I even had some young hottie say hello the other day in the produce section of the Harris Teeter. That was exciting and scary on SO many levels! LOL Ya'll know what I'm talking about!
Well, tomorrow, in my plan to keep up with posting daily, I will tell you all about losing my hair. Seriously, what's up with that crazy do in the picture Sunday night? I just don't know what to do with it now..... I'm open to suggestions!
I went to see my PCP's PA, and she did some orthostatic BP measurements sp see what was going on. I was certainly symptomatic. She did a test run to see if I could come off the Norvasc. I went back a week later, and lo and behold, I can finally completely kick the BP meds. That was the last one since I came off the other one that day of surgery. I really am excited!! My BP was 112/68 the last time I took it. And to think that 6 short months ago, my BP was constantly around 150/90, and was becoming more and more uncontrollable. The cardiologist even mentioned increasing my dose of Norvasc before surgery, though that was not necessary as it turns out.
So I really am excited about the quality of life improvements that I have now. I can sit on the couch and bend over until my chest touches my knees and tie my shoes while still continuing to breathe normally. I can do the same while painting my toes. I can get down in the floor and get right back up with ease. No grunting or feeling like my knees are going to explode. Heck, the other day I squatted down in Mom's yard and stayed like that for a minute or so while I tried to get her neurotic dog to stop barking. Not only would I have not done that before surgery, if I had, I'd have not been able to stay like that more than a few seconds.
Now that the scale seems to move a little slower, I'm doing a couple of things to keep my head sane. First, I'm staying off the scales. Second, I'm trying to focus on those QoL improvements that give me non-scale victories. And I'm staying accountable with my eating - protein first! We haven't started our running program yet, but I am hopeful that my back will calm down enough that I can try it in the next few days. I have an appt to see the spine doc in September, but may get in sooner if it continues to bother me. I'm basically having sharp, shooting pains down my left leg and in my lower left back. They come and go very quickly, but it paralyzes me while it's happening. I think I may need to have it injected again. But, the one thing I am doing is reading a book called ChiRunning by Danny Dreyer. And out of that, I have come to realize that Tai Chi can help me gain core strength, flexibility and relax all at the same time. So to that end, G and I are going to start going to some Tai Chi classes at the downtown Y starting tomorrow night. I'm pretty excited about it. I'm just anxious to get back out and do some running since I can't help but think it will feel a lot different now that I've lost a whole Paris Hilton.
So that's where my head, and weight, is now. I am doing well, felling really good most days. I still struggle with eating too fast, and it still hurts when I do. But oddly, I am glad it still works that way, and I hope and pray it always will. Lots of folks tell me I'm looking younger, but at the same time are wary I'll be offended. No way will I ever get upset to hear I look younger! It'd be different if I didn't go into it knowing I made a drastic life change, yanno? Heck, I even had some young hottie say hello the other day in the produce section of the Harris Teeter. That was exciting and scary on SO many levels! LOL Ya'll know what I'm talking about!
Well, tomorrow, in my plan to keep up with posting daily, I will tell you all about losing my hair. Seriously, what's up with that crazy do in the picture Sunday night? I just don't know what to do with it now..... I'm open to suggestions!
Monday, August 3, 2009
I know I'm slack, so gimme some slack, OK?
Howdy! I have been so crazy busy each day here at work, and then I go home and it seems the list of stuff to do grows each day I'm not there to work on it. It's crazy! But we wanted a new house, and we totally love our new house! I'm still working on the studio, but I had to fight the wasps for territory this past Saturday. They built a nest in the window where we have the A/C unit. Not fun. But I did find out that Raid really will shoot their asses from 20 feet away!
G is working on the yard and garden like a madman. We have peas and green beans sprouting. He also planted some lettuce but he accidentally killed the seedlings last week when he left the top on the little seed starter. It cooked them. But we have more seeds so we're starting again. We really do need to take more pictures of the yard and house to document the transformation. My crepe myrtles are finally blooming and that makes me happy as well. It's all a work in progress.
But speaking of transformations, I have been having a few. Got into a size 16 comfortably about 2 weeks ago. Was thrilled! That was until I got my ass into size 14 shorts yesterday. I was SO excited, I ran G down in the store and told him I was buying them just because I could wear them! Well, and I needed new shorts - the ones I was wearing were size 20 and were falling off me. I gave them to Mom when I got to her house. So then, I also have gotten to One-derland - that would finally be a weight that doesn't start with a 2, or a 3, for that matter. I can't believe it! I am posting a picture of me on the scales the day I got below 200 for the first time.
That was about 10 days ago. I've been kinda stuck around there since then, so I've been getting frustrated with that. I started to try to focus on non-scale victories though. So last night since I was feeling kinda full of myself after the size 14s, I decided to try on the one pair of stretch jeans I've been saving from my heaviest weight. So in the picture you will see I am standing in one leg of those jeans. Pretty unbelievable. I am going to keep them around and continue to try them again and again to see how easily I fit into that one leg. But I gotta tell you, I never thought I'd see that day! Oh, and I took measurements and totaled them. I've lost 11 inches off my hips, and 11.5 inches off my waist. From neck to ankles, if you add them all together, I've lost over 74 inches since I had surgery.
I'm still getting used to this new body. It seems surreal some days. And just like before, sometimes now it's hard for me to really "see" what I look like - the crepe-y skin on my arms or my thighs. But hey, it's better than being morbidly obese and dying slowly. And I keep telling myself that it sure as hell isn't anything that $5K and a scalpel can't cure!
More later, perhaps tomorrow. I've got more to report and I really need to go do some house work now. So check out this picture.....
What's up with the boobs yesterday? Geez, for a minute there it actually looked like I still have some.....
G is working on the yard and garden like a madman. We have peas and green beans sprouting. He also planted some lettuce but he accidentally killed the seedlings last week when he left the top on the little seed starter. It cooked them. But we have more seeds so we're starting again. We really do need to take more pictures of the yard and house to document the transformation. My crepe myrtles are finally blooming and that makes me happy as well. It's all a work in progress.
But speaking of transformations, I have been having a few. Got into a size 16 comfortably about 2 weeks ago. Was thrilled! That was until I got my ass into size 14 shorts yesterday. I was SO excited, I ran G down in the store and told him I was buying them just because I could wear them! Well, and I needed new shorts - the ones I was wearing were size 20 and were falling off me. I gave them to Mom when I got to her house. So then, I also have gotten to One-derland - that would finally be a weight that doesn't start with a 2, or a 3, for that matter. I can't believe it! I am posting a picture of me on the scales the day I got below 200 for the first time.
That was about 10 days ago. I've been kinda stuck around there since then, so I've been getting frustrated with that. I started to try to focus on non-scale victories though. So last night since I was feeling kinda full of myself after the size 14s, I decided to try on the one pair of stretch jeans I've been saving from my heaviest weight. So in the picture you will see I am standing in one leg of those jeans. Pretty unbelievable. I am going to keep them around and continue to try them again and again to see how easily I fit into that one leg. But I gotta tell you, I never thought I'd see that day! Oh, and I took measurements and totaled them. I've lost 11 inches off my hips, and 11.5 inches off my waist. From neck to ankles, if you add them all together, I've lost over 74 inches since I had surgery.
I'm still getting used to this new body. It seems surreal some days. And just like before, sometimes now it's hard for me to really "see" what I look like - the crepe-y skin on my arms or my thighs. But hey, it's better than being morbidly obese and dying slowly. And I keep telling myself that it sure as hell isn't anything that $5K and a scalpel can't cure!
More later, perhaps tomorrow. I've got more to report and I really need to go do some house work now. So check out this picture.....
What's up with the boobs yesterday? Geez, for a minute there it actually looked like I still have some.....
Monday, June 15, 2009
Holy Cow, has it been THAT long since I posted?
Sorry, folks. Life has really taken me for a ride these last few weeks. I started a new job with ClinForce as a clinical data indexer (while I am still looking for other clinical work), then Gerald and I found a house we absolutely love and we bought it! Buying was one thing, but moving has been a bear! You know, it's bad when you come to work on a Monday morning and your co-worker looks at you and says, "Gee, you look exhausted!" Nice to know I hide it well. Might be better if I actually had on some make-up. I always look dead when I don't wear mascara.
Anyway.... I am happy to report that last Friday the movers came and in 4 1/2 hours, they had all our stuff moved and in place. Wow. Best money I've spent the whole move. But also a big thanks to Stephen and Julia for helping us with a couple of truckloads of stuff from storage in Oxford and from the apartment yesterday. It was a HUGE help! Now to unpack and settle in....
In other news, I have almost reached another great big milestone in my weight loss. Granted, I have not stepped on the scale since last Wed. and I don't know when I will again - maybe this Wed. - but I have lost 90 pounds. I can't believe I am 10 pounds away from the Century Club. Wow. I find it hard to fathom 100 pounds lost. I feel kinda weird about that. I mean, I feel like I feel normal, yet I find it hard to believe. I know I still have to lose much more - about 70-75 pounds to get to my goal. I guess the only way to really describe it would be that it's kind of like an out-of-body experience. It almost seems impossible that I will ever actually reach my goal of 135-140, but yet I do continue to shrink.
I promise to be better at updating, though, and I will most definitely shout it from the rooftops when I've lost 100 pounds. After that, my next goals in order are:
- start a running program - 200 pounds is the magic number to start so I don't blow out my knees
- reach One-derland (a weight that starts with a "1") - 199 is a good place to start
- reach the weight I got down to as a young 20-something by starving - 175 pounds
- reach Dr. Smith's goal for me - his goal is 167 (that's only 48 pounds from now)
- reach my goal - the range is 135-140 (that's 75-80 pounds from now)
And somewhere in there I hope to be able to actually wear all the beautiful clothes Bonnie gave me. Some things I can wear now, but most things need a few more inches before they will fit and look good enough to wear out. Of course, if I will ever break down and buy some Spanx, I think they'll fit sooner. Foundation garments are a wonderful thing, girls!
Anyway, that's about it for now. I do look forward to having a series of parties and gatherings so folks can come see the house once I get things straight. I can't wait to start enjoying the screen porch - I love how it keeps the mosquitoes at bay! Plus, we have so many birds and a chipmunk named Gus!
Anyway.... I am happy to report that last Friday the movers came and in 4 1/2 hours, they had all our stuff moved and in place. Wow. Best money I've spent the whole move. But also a big thanks to Stephen and Julia for helping us with a couple of truckloads of stuff from storage in Oxford and from the apartment yesterday. It was a HUGE help! Now to unpack and settle in....
In other news, I have almost reached another great big milestone in my weight loss. Granted, I have not stepped on the scale since last Wed. and I don't know when I will again - maybe this Wed. - but I have lost 90 pounds. I can't believe I am 10 pounds away from the Century Club. Wow. I find it hard to fathom 100 pounds lost. I feel kinda weird about that. I mean, I feel like I feel normal, yet I find it hard to believe. I know I still have to lose much more - about 70-75 pounds to get to my goal. I guess the only way to really describe it would be that it's kind of like an out-of-body experience. It almost seems impossible that I will ever actually reach my goal of 135-140, but yet I do continue to shrink.
I promise to be better at updating, though, and I will most definitely shout it from the rooftops when I've lost 100 pounds. After that, my next goals in order are:
- start a running program - 200 pounds is the magic number to start so I don't blow out my knees
- reach One-derland (a weight that starts with a "1") - 199 is a good place to start
- reach the weight I got down to as a young 20-something by starving - 175 pounds
- reach Dr. Smith's goal for me - his goal is 167 (that's only 48 pounds from now)
- reach my goal - the range is 135-140 (that's 75-80 pounds from now)
And somewhere in there I hope to be able to actually wear all the beautiful clothes Bonnie gave me. Some things I can wear now, but most things need a few more inches before they will fit and look good enough to wear out. Of course, if I will ever break down and buy some Spanx, I think they'll fit sooner. Foundation garments are a wonderful thing, girls!
Anyway, that's about it for now. I do look forward to having a series of parties and gatherings so folks can come see the house once I get things straight. I can't wait to start enjoying the screen porch - I love how it keeps the mosquitoes at bay! Plus, we have so many birds and a chipmunk named Gus!
Thursday, April 30, 2009
New Measurements
Short post here since I'm at work.
I took my measurements this morning and I've lost another 17.75 inches since I last measured in March. How wild! I only lost 9 inches from Feb. to March, but from March to now, I lost twice that. It's quite funny to me how one month the inches don't go as much as in others. It's like little spurts of loss. Hey, I'll take it either way! I knew Gerald had said he could really tell it in my waist area. I lost 2 inches in my waist, 2 1/4 in my hips, and (BooHoo!) 4 inches in my bust! I knew the girls would go south at some point, and that point must be now!
In addition to my loss of inches, my weight loss for the month was 15 pounds. That's actually more than last month, and still right on track. I hope I can have one more good month like that. If I do, I'll be ecstatic! Mainly because it will mean that I am no longer morbidly obese according to a BMI chart! I actually will hit that mark in another 8 pounds! I can't wait!!!!
BTW, that's a grand total of 48.7 inches! I just can't wrap my mind around that.
More later when I have time!
I took my measurements this morning and I've lost another 17.75 inches since I last measured in March. How wild! I only lost 9 inches from Feb. to March, but from March to now, I lost twice that. It's quite funny to me how one month the inches don't go as much as in others. It's like little spurts of loss. Hey, I'll take it either way! I knew Gerald had said he could really tell it in my waist area. I lost 2 inches in my waist, 2 1/4 in my hips, and (BooHoo!) 4 inches in my bust! I knew the girls would go south at some point, and that point must be now!
In addition to my loss of inches, my weight loss for the month was 15 pounds. That's actually more than last month, and still right on track. I hope I can have one more good month like that. If I do, I'll be ecstatic! Mainly because it will mean that I am no longer morbidly obese according to a BMI chart! I actually will hit that mark in another 8 pounds! I can't wait!!!!
BTW, that's a grand total of 48.7 inches! I just can't wrap my mind around that.
More later when I have time!
Friday, April 24, 2009
3 month check up
We went down to Georgia last Thursday night after work. Managed to miss the nasty storms that rolled through Atlanta packing golf ball-sized hail though. Didn't get there until 2:00 a.m. Yowza! But the 4 hours sleep we did get were nice.
Went to Dr. Smith's office at 8:15 a.m. for my appt. with him, and then on to have blood drawn. I had wondered if I would weigh the same on his scales as on my own, so ours must be pretty close since I weighed a half pound less than the last time I weighed. I clocked in at 235.1 on the doc's scales. We talked about my vitamins and my diet. All doing pretty good with one notable exception. {Last Wednesday night I ate some barbecue and stew from Hog Heaven here in Durham. I ate too much and ate too fast. Once I took that last bite of stew, I knew it was not good and was way too late. Time I swallowed, I was running to the bathroom. And up it came. It was a horrid experience, but was nonetheless a very good teacher. Note to self: LISTEN to the dragon and what she tells you. Geesh! It took a good couple of days to get my insides to accommodate food again.}
Overall, I think Dr. Smith was really pleased with my progress. He whipped out the calculator and I knew what he was doing. He calculates that at 3 months post-op, I have lost 43.4% of my excess weight. Woo Hoo!!!! I am thrilled, and I even got a big ol' smile out of him (not an easy feat, I tell you)! He said it will probably slow down and I am prepared for that - of course I say that until it actually happens. I'm sure at that point I will panic. But, it does look like I have a decent chance at reaching goal, which for me is 135-140 pounds. That will put me at a normal BMI for a woman 5'3" tall. Of course, if I manage to gain the inch I lost while morbidly obese, that will be all the better. I don't care how tall I am, as long as I can run without pain so Gerald and I can run some half marathons together. I guess I'm just thrilled that Dr. Smith is so happy.
I got my blood drawn, and it will be a couple of weeks before I hear anything, I'm sure. He is going to make sure I get a copy of my results so I can track trends, and we will talk about tweaking my vitamins if I need to. He seems to think I might be ok since I started taking lots and lots right out of the gate. I knew I just didn't want to play catch up, especially with Vit. D and calcium. Not a good place to be.
Anyway, I have much more interesting stuff to talk about, but I also want to be able to post pictures, and I don't have them off the camera yet. I met one of my angelettes on Friday. Her name is Jill, and she is having surgery with Dr. Smith tomorrow, Wed., April 29th. I'll post our picture soon. I also met a great group of gals at IKEA on Saturday down in Atlanta that are all pre-op. I was able to answer some questions and generally reassure them that they will love their DS, too! And now, this coming weekend, I will be going to Leicester, NC (outside Asheville) to visit with my other angelette, Nancy. Her surgery will be with Dr. Smith on May 20th. I'm so excited for both Jill and Nancy! And hey, it makes me feel good to pay this wonderful new life forward. I might look a lot better, but you can't put a price tag on feeling like a million bucks!
Went to Dr. Smith's office at 8:15 a.m. for my appt. with him, and then on to have blood drawn. I had wondered if I would weigh the same on his scales as on my own, so ours must be pretty close since I weighed a half pound less than the last time I weighed. I clocked in at 235.1 on the doc's scales. We talked about my vitamins and my diet. All doing pretty good with one notable exception. {Last Wednesday night I ate some barbecue and stew from Hog Heaven here in Durham. I ate too much and ate too fast. Once I took that last bite of stew, I knew it was not good and was way too late. Time I swallowed, I was running to the bathroom. And up it came. It was a horrid experience, but was nonetheless a very good teacher. Note to self: LISTEN to the dragon and what she tells you. Geesh! It took a good couple of days to get my insides to accommodate food again.}
Overall, I think Dr. Smith was really pleased with my progress. He whipped out the calculator and I knew what he was doing. He calculates that at 3 months post-op, I have lost 43.4% of my excess weight. Woo Hoo!!!! I am thrilled, and I even got a big ol' smile out of him (not an easy feat, I tell you)! He said it will probably slow down and I am prepared for that - of course I say that until it actually happens. I'm sure at that point I will panic. But, it does look like I have a decent chance at reaching goal, which for me is 135-140 pounds. That will put me at a normal BMI for a woman 5'3" tall. Of course, if I manage to gain the inch I lost while morbidly obese, that will be all the better. I don't care how tall I am, as long as I can run without pain so Gerald and I can run some half marathons together. I guess I'm just thrilled that Dr. Smith is so happy.
I got my blood drawn, and it will be a couple of weeks before I hear anything, I'm sure. He is going to make sure I get a copy of my results so I can track trends, and we will talk about tweaking my vitamins if I need to. He seems to think I might be ok since I started taking lots and lots right out of the gate. I knew I just didn't want to play catch up, especially with Vit. D and calcium. Not a good place to be.
Anyway, I have much more interesting stuff to talk about, but I also want to be able to post pictures, and I don't have them off the camera yet. I met one of my angelettes on Friday. Her name is Jill, and she is having surgery with Dr. Smith tomorrow, Wed., April 29th. I'll post our picture soon. I also met a great group of gals at IKEA on Saturday down in Atlanta that are all pre-op. I was able to answer some questions and generally reassure them that they will love their DS, too! And now, this coming weekend, I will be going to Leicester, NC (outside Asheville) to visit with my other angelette, Nancy. Her surgery will be with Dr. Smith on May 20th. I'm so excited for both Jill and Nancy! And hey, it makes me feel good to pay this wonderful new life forward. I might look a lot better, but you can't put a price tag on feeling like a million bucks!
Wednesday, April 15, 2009
I broke into the 230s!!!
Hot damn!!! I am SO excited. In just 2 more pounds, I will weigh the same as Gerald! Call that hitting my 1st goal. I can't wait!
Frankly, I had worried that I might have stalled because my cousin Stephen's birthday party was this weekend. We partied hard! I made coleslaw, baked beans with molasses in it (YUM!), and deviled eggs. I only made 72 deviled eggs, for cripe's sake! Of course, they are the perfect DS food! It was all so very good. And I was faithful to my DS in that I only ate protein and a little tiny bit of coleslaw and beans. I did eat about a teaspoon of butter cream icing off his birthday cake, but it was SO worth it! It was yummy. I also had one forkful of chocolate cupcake (from Costco). Both of the sweets passed the "bliss" test, so I was glad I ate them. (The "bliss" test is that I ask myself if eating this food will bring me bliss. If the answer is yes, then I have one bite. And that one bite is savored and enjoyed. Not a bad way to have goodies and not feel deprived, if you ask me.)
I am just so freakin' excited to be here, in the 230s. I can't believe that I have lost damn close to 70 pounds - 67 to be exact. It feels unreal. I even noticed yesterday that my black jeans that I got back into 20 pounds ago are loose on me! That seems totally unreal! I even wore a size 18 top yesterday and a size 18 blazer that I have not worn in years either! I am really trying to enjoy these clothes while I can. It will be interesting to take measurements this month (next week) to see how body shape is changing.
I'm really excited to be heading to Atlanta next Thursday so that I can see Dr. Smith next Friday. I am anxious to have my labs done so that I can track my vitamin levels. I started on 50K IU of dry D and 25K IU of dry A as soon as I got home and I am hopeful that my levels have stayed the same, if not, increased some. I think Dr. Smith will be pleased with my progress. According to my calculations, if my goal weight is 140, I have lost 41% of my excess weight. If I lose another 4 pounds next week, I will be at 43% excess weight lost by the time I see him. If I am to be on track to lose 100% of my weight, the general guidelines are to have lost 25% by 3 months, 50% by 6 months, and 80% by 1 year. If I can keep this pace up, I am actually on schedule to lose it all by my 1 year anniversary, probably more like by 9 months post-op. I do realize it will slow down, but I am working my butt off to make sure I keep my metabolism up by exercising and by keeping my carb intake low.
Now, if only I could eat a hamburger patty without it sitting like a ton of bricks in my belly.....
Oh, and if you're reading this Nancy (and Carla), when are you two hussies coming over here so Nan can raid my closet?!?! For Nan, I have linen. For you, Carla, I have wine and beer! Call me!!!
Frankly, I had worried that I might have stalled because my cousin Stephen's birthday party was this weekend. We partied hard! I made coleslaw, baked beans with molasses in it (YUM!), and deviled eggs. I only made 72 deviled eggs, for cripe's sake! Of course, they are the perfect DS food! It was all so very good. And I was faithful to my DS in that I only ate protein and a little tiny bit of coleslaw and beans. I did eat about a teaspoon of butter cream icing off his birthday cake, but it was SO worth it! It was yummy. I also had one forkful of chocolate cupcake (from Costco). Both of the sweets passed the "bliss" test, so I was glad I ate them. (The "bliss" test is that I ask myself if eating this food will bring me bliss. If the answer is yes, then I have one bite. And that one bite is savored and enjoyed. Not a bad way to have goodies and not feel deprived, if you ask me.)
I am just so freakin' excited to be here, in the 230s. I can't believe that I have lost damn close to 70 pounds - 67 to be exact. It feels unreal. I even noticed yesterday that my black jeans that I got back into 20 pounds ago are loose on me! That seems totally unreal! I even wore a size 18 top yesterday and a size 18 blazer that I have not worn in years either! I am really trying to enjoy these clothes while I can. It will be interesting to take measurements this month (next week) to see how body shape is changing.
I'm really excited to be heading to Atlanta next Thursday so that I can see Dr. Smith next Friday. I am anxious to have my labs done so that I can track my vitamin levels. I started on 50K IU of dry D and 25K IU of dry A as soon as I got home and I am hopeful that my levels have stayed the same, if not, increased some. I think Dr. Smith will be pleased with my progress. According to my calculations, if my goal weight is 140, I have lost 41% of my excess weight. If I lose another 4 pounds next week, I will be at 43% excess weight lost by the time I see him. If I am to be on track to lose 100% of my weight, the general guidelines are to have lost 25% by 3 months, 50% by 6 months, and 80% by 1 year. If I can keep this pace up, I am actually on schedule to lose it all by my 1 year anniversary, probably more like by 9 months post-op. I do realize it will slow down, but I am working my butt off to make sure I keep my metabolism up by exercising and by keeping my carb intake low.
Now, if only I could eat a hamburger patty without it sitting like a ton of bricks in my belly.....
Oh, and if you're reading this Nancy (and Carla), when are you two hussies coming over here so Nan can raid my closet?!?! For Nan, I have linen. For you, Carla, I have wine and beer! Call me!!!
Wednesday, April 8, 2009
10 weeks ago today......
... I climbed up on a surgical table that would change my life. I can't believe it's been 10 weeks. I remember being in the very early stages of post-op life and only being able to drink those awful liquids and thinking I'd never make it to better days. Invariably, every one of my post-op friends swore to me it would get better and darned if it hasn't! Of course then I was cursing them under my breath... LOL. But the proof is in the pudding as they say. And this morning I had a cup of coffee with cream and Splenda, one egg over easy and 2 slices of bacon. Life is indeed very good. If it's remotely possible to love bacon more since surgery, I think I'm there.
So on to the numbers. As of this morning, I am down to 242.4, which is 52 pounds lost since surgery and a total of 63 pounds from my highest weight. I can't believe that in just 3 more pounds I will be in the 230s, something I haven't seen since 2001 when Karen and I ran the Rock 'n' Roll Half Marathon. I was SO in shape then, but for the sake of my knees, I am refraining from running until I hit the 200 pounds mark. One of my 1st goals is to weigh less than Gerald. I will do that this month. I am only 8 pounds away from weighing the same as him. It's going to be a glorious day when I hit that mark! I did take measurements on the 24th of March and I lost an additional 9.125 inches, for a total loss of 30.875 inches.
I've gone from a 46DD bra down to a comfortable 42D. Clothing sizes are harder to pin down, but I think I've gone from a 24/26 down to a 20. I can wear some things that are 18s and others that are 22s. Levis, for example, must run small because I'm in 22 in those. But I'll take it. All I know is that I haven't been able to wear those jeans in YEARS (and heck, they're practically brand new)! I can wear plain old XL sweat pants - not 1X, there IS a distinction. I can wear 18 tops and thanks to the "girls", I do still have to have 1X in some tops. But hey, a little while ago, a 1X would have been a dream. One thing that does surprise me is that I am finding out how to buy clothes that are comfortable but that fit. I'm used to wearing clothes that look like a tent. But the other day I bought a cute printed knit top from TJ Maxx. It fits me without being too tight. I put it on last Saturday and Gerald said, "Damn Baby, you look hot!" Did I mention that I love that man?
So while I do long to see more changes faster, I can see the changes that have taken place. I do have to remind myself to look for them. I still wonder what I will look like when I reach goal weight. It boggles the mind. I hope I am lucky enough to see people that don't recognize me. That would be SO cool! This truly IS a gift and a journey. I am enjoying taking the scenic route, because so far, the scenery is really improving. I thank God each and every day for my life and the gift of having a healthier new me!
Now, if only I can get my friend Nancy to come raid my closet. There is a lot of beautiful linen here with her name ALL over it!
So on to the numbers. As of this morning, I am down to 242.4, which is 52 pounds lost since surgery and a total of 63 pounds from my highest weight. I can't believe that in just 3 more pounds I will be in the 230s, something I haven't seen since 2001 when Karen and I ran the Rock 'n' Roll Half Marathon. I was SO in shape then, but for the sake of my knees, I am refraining from running until I hit the 200 pounds mark. One of my 1st goals is to weigh less than Gerald. I will do that this month. I am only 8 pounds away from weighing the same as him. It's going to be a glorious day when I hit that mark! I did take measurements on the 24th of March and I lost an additional 9.125 inches, for a total loss of 30.875 inches.
I've gone from a 46DD bra down to a comfortable 42D. Clothing sizes are harder to pin down, but I think I've gone from a 24/26 down to a 20. I can wear some things that are 18s and others that are 22s. Levis, for example, must run small because I'm in 22 in those. But I'll take it. All I know is that I haven't been able to wear those jeans in YEARS (and heck, they're practically brand new)! I can wear plain old XL sweat pants - not 1X, there IS a distinction. I can wear 18 tops and thanks to the "girls", I do still have to have 1X in some tops. But hey, a little while ago, a 1X would have been a dream. One thing that does surprise me is that I am finding out how to buy clothes that are comfortable but that fit. I'm used to wearing clothes that look like a tent. But the other day I bought a cute printed knit top from TJ Maxx. It fits me without being too tight. I put it on last Saturday and Gerald said, "Damn Baby, you look hot!" Did I mention that I love that man?
So while I do long to see more changes faster, I can see the changes that have taken place. I do have to remind myself to look for them. I still wonder what I will look like when I reach goal weight. It boggles the mind. I hope I am lucky enough to see people that don't recognize me. That would be SO cool! This truly IS a gift and a journey. I am enjoying taking the scenic route, because so far, the scenery is really improving. I thank God each and every day for my life and the gift of having a healthier new me!
Now, if only I can get my friend Nancy to come raid my closet. There is a lot of beautiful linen here with her name ALL over it!
Monday, April 6, 2009
9 1/2 Weeks from surgery- if only I had (the hot) Mickey Rourke this long....
Wow, I knew it had been too long since I'd updated, but I had no idea it had been this long. Sorry about that to my friends and family who read to try and check in on me and how I'm doing. I will try to do better, promise.
So... I passed the month 2 mark. I lost a total of 14 pounds in month 2, but was disappointed with it because I wanted it to be more like 16 pounds by that point. And you may say, well, that only 2 pounds, but to me it might as well be 20. I know, the mind plays cruel tricks.....
Now here I sit at 9 1/2 weeks out (10 weeks on Wednesday) and I am down to 246. That's a total loss of 59 pounds, 48 since surgery. I have decided that I will change and only weigh once a week rather than twice a week as I had been doing because I can't stand the constant up and down. If it looks like that starts to drive me crazy, then I may go to weighing less frequently than that. I am trying to focus on getting in protein 1st and then indulging in some veggies. I have had a couple of days where I ate some bread and it did bother me, so I'm cutting it back out. I have stopped really measuring my food, but I think I need to get back in that habit as well. My eyes have always been larger than my tummy. But oddly enough, I got 3 Chicken Selects from McD's yesterday and I could only eat 1. I eventually ate the other 2, but it took me a couple more hours. So although I feel like at times that I eat too much, if I stop and think about it, I still consume WAAAAYYYY less than I used to. Again, cruel mind games. They say they operate on our guts, not our heads.
Gerald and I go to the gym at last 3 times a week, and more often than not, it's 4-5 times a week. I'm building muscle because I can see it and feel it, but I am experiencing a few problems as a consequence. I think that because my core isn't as strong as it could/should be, I am having some back issues. I have to remind myself that I still have a herniated disc in my lower back. Recently it has started to remind me that it's still there. No numbness or lasting pain, but at times I can be sitting still in a chair and have fleeting shooting pains run from my lower left back down my left leg and to my foot. For a few seconds, it hurts tremendously and feels slightly weak. But it always goes away. I asked the doc about it and she said that there's not much to do unless it goes numb again. Oh great. I suppose I'll just have to deal with it. But I did rest an extra day today and will go back to the gym tomorrow. I'm trying to be mindful of better posture as well. My Nanny would be so proud.....
As for the head issues, I'm going to a book discussion tomorrow night that is growing out of our monthly WLS support group locally. I'm the only DS-er in the group, but my head doesn't know the difference. We're going to be discussing and working through the book The Beck Diet Solution, written by Dr. Judith Beck. She doesn't target any specific diet, but rather the emotional/mental issues associated with weight loss, whatever the mode of achievement. I think it will be a really good exercise for me because I have been so focused on getting back to normal that now I need to find a new normal that is truly compatible with my new physiology and life.
Well, that's just a few of my many ramblings. I'm off to finish some housework. I weigh in on Wednesday, so I'll post an update then. I think, too, it will be time for another picture. I sure do hope I sprout some collarbones pretty soon!
So... I passed the month 2 mark. I lost a total of 14 pounds in month 2, but was disappointed with it because I wanted it to be more like 16 pounds by that point. And you may say, well, that only 2 pounds, but to me it might as well be 20. I know, the mind plays cruel tricks.....
Now here I sit at 9 1/2 weeks out (10 weeks on Wednesday) and I am down to 246. That's a total loss of 59 pounds, 48 since surgery. I have decided that I will change and only weigh once a week rather than twice a week as I had been doing because I can't stand the constant up and down. If it looks like that starts to drive me crazy, then I may go to weighing less frequently than that. I am trying to focus on getting in protein 1st and then indulging in some veggies. I have had a couple of days where I ate some bread and it did bother me, so I'm cutting it back out. I have stopped really measuring my food, but I think I need to get back in that habit as well. My eyes have always been larger than my tummy. But oddly enough, I got 3 Chicken Selects from McD's yesterday and I could only eat 1. I eventually ate the other 2, but it took me a couple more hours. So although I feel like at times that I eat too much, if I stop and think about it, I still consume WAAAAYYYY less than I used to. Again, cruel mind games. They say they operate on our guts, not our heads.
Gerald and I go to the gym at last 3 times a week, and more often than not, it's 4-5 times a week. I'm building muscle because I can see it and feel it, but I am experiencing a few problems as a consequence. I think that because my core isn't as strong as it could/should be, I am having some back issues. I have to remind myself that I still have a herniated disc in my lower back. Recently it has started to remind me that it's still there. No numbness or lasting pain, but at times I can be sitting still in a chair and have fleeting shooting pains run from my lower left back down my left leg and to my foot. For a few seconds, it hurts tremendously and feels slightly weak. But it always goes away. I asked the doc about it and she said that there's not much to do unless it goes numb again. Oh great. I suppose I'll just have to deal with it. But I did rest an extra day today and will go back to the gym tomorrow. I'm trying to be mindful of better posture as well. My Nanny would be so proud.....
As for the head issues, I'm going to a book discussion tomorrow night that is growing out of our monthly WLS support group locally. I'm the only DS-er in the group, but my head doesn't know the difference. We're going to be discussing and working through the book The Beck Diet Solution, written by Dr. Judith Beck. She doesn't target any specific diet, but rather the emotional/mental issues associated with weight loss, whatever the mode of achievement. I think it will be a really good exercise for me because I have been so focused on getting back to normal that now I need to find a new normal that is truly compatible with my new physiology and life.
Well, that's just a few of my many ramblings. I'm off to finish some housework. I weigh in on Wednesday, so I'll post an update then. I think, too, it will be time for another picture. I sure do hope I sprout some collarbones pretty soon!
Thursday, March 19, 2009
Day late again! 7 weeks out
Yesterday was 7 week since surgery. I had a pretty busy day so I forgot to update my blog. Oops.
I weighed in yesterday morning at 252.2 pounds. That's 42 pounds since surgery and a total of 53 pounds lost. I am squarely in the part of losing where I can't really see the changes taking place. I'm sure that's probably because I do spend a fair amount of time in the mirror wondering when I'm going to sprout a collarbone or what I'm going to look like thin. I keep wondering how my face will change. It seems strange really.
One cool thing that happened yesterday though was that I went to a Meet-up last night in Raleigh about plastic surgery. Yes, I know it's early yet, but given the price tag I'm sure it's never too early to think about it and certainly not too early to start saving money for it. Geez, the cost!!!! Anyway, I digress.....
I walked in to the room and one of our male Meet-up members who used to be quite a big guy (and who looks great now!), walked up and said, "Wow, you look great! You're losing so fast!" I was so stunned, I didn't know what to say. I think I stammered out a "Thank you." At least I hope I did. I do remember asking if he really thought he could tell a pretty major difference. He swore he could tell.
So there you go. Changes. And I can't even really tell. I think I'm ready to be at the point where none of my clothes fit, but I have to remind myself daily that I didn't get fat in one day and I'm not going to get thin in one day either. And right now, it looks like I'm losing at about 4 pounds a week. I'll take it.
I'm going to sit on Gerald until he takes a picture today, and I have to do measurements as well. I'll post when I have all that info. Maybe he can do another morphing thing with my pre-op picture like the did with the one on Day 25. Maybe that will help me to see the changes.
I weighed in yesterday morning at 252.2 pounds. That's 42 pounds since surgery and a total of 53 pounds lost. I am squarely in the part of losing where I can't really see the changes taking place. I'm sure that's probably because I do spend a fair amount of time in the mirror wondering when I'm going to sprout a collarbone or what I'm going to look like thin. I keep wondering how my face will change. It seems strange really.
One cool thing that happened yesterday though was that I went to a Meet-up last night in Raleigh about plastic surgery. Yes, I know it's early yet, but given the price tag I'm sure it's never too early to think about it and certainly not too early to start saving money for it. Geez, the cost!!!! Anyway, I digress.....
I walked in to the room and one of our male Meet-up members who used to be quite a big guy (and who looks great now!), walked up and said, "Wow, you look great! You're losing so fast!" I was so stunned, I didn't know what to say. I think I stammered out a "Thank you." At least I hope I did. I do remember asking if he really thought he could tell a pretty major difference. He swore he could tell.
So there you go. Changes. And I can't even really tell. I think I'm ready to be at the point where none of my clothes fit, but I have to remind myself daily that I didn't get fat in one day and I'm not going to get thin in one day either. And right now, it looks like I'm losing at about 4 pounds a week. I'll take it.
I'm going to sit on Gerald until he takes a picture today, and I have to do measurements as well. I'll post when I have all that info. Maybe he can do another morphing thing with my pre-op picture like the did with the one on Day 25. Maybe that will help me to see the changes.
Thursday, March 12, 2009
Day Late - Weigh-in Wednesday 6 weeks
Yesterday was 6 full weeks since surgery. I weighed in at 256.4, 38 pounds less than the day of surgery and a total of 49 pounds from my highest weight. Physically, I feel good. I think I look better. We'll take measurements next week to see how much more I've lost in inches.
I'm WAY stressed these days, so eating is not the comfort it once was. It can't be. So I've cried, screamed, cursed, and just mainly been angry about the loss of my job. So in short, I'm having to deal with it instead of stuffing it down with food. I have no interest in eating because if I do and if I eat what I know would comfort me, it would hurt anyway.
I'll be ok. I just have to get through this, and the next few days will be the worst I guess. I'll be back with more positive news soon. Love to you all.
I'm WAY stressed these days, so eating is not the comfort it once was. It can't be. So I've cried, screamed, cursed, and just mainly been angry about the loss of my job. So in short, I'm having to deal with it instead of stuffing it down with food. I have no interest in eating because if I do and if I eat what I know would comfort me, it would hurt anyway.
I'll be ok. I just have to get through this, and the next few days will be the worst I guess. I'll be back with more positive news soon. Love to you all.
Tuesday, March 10, 2009
Discovering muscles
It sometimes amazes me at how much I actually don't mind... dare I even say, like.... going to the gym these days. I think part of it is how I know I am finally able to make progress instead of it constantly being an exercise in futility.
As of 2 weeks post-op, I was cleared to lift weights. I thought that was a little too soon, so I waited until week 4. Now that I'm almost 6 weeks out, I have really started to try to lift smart so I can see progress without building too much muscle. I need to tone. And, frankly, I am a little worried about having bat wings. My legs have always been kind of muscular, and certainly now are becoming more defined. But my arms are quite another sad, sad story. So I've been lifting weights, alternating between upper and lower body. Yesterday, Gerald said he could feel the muscles in my shoulders. I didn't believe him until he showed me. LOL And even then, it sure was a foreign feel to my fingers. Another interesting thing I discovered this morning was soreness in my inner thighs. Yesterday was a lower body workout day and I did the adductor/abductor machine with increasing weights with each set. It's a technique described in Body-for-LIFE. This morning when I went to get out of my chair at work, I noticed I was sore, and it came as a surprise. It's not the kind of soreness where I was in pain, but the good kind where I could feel it and be mindful that I had exercised.
All this really does surprise and amaze me. I can't wait to be down to 200 pounds! Because that's my goal for starting to run again. I ran the half marathon in 2001 and weighed 230 when I did. I want to be able to start out running at a lower weight than I've seen in the last 20 years and then go from there. I remember what it felt like to be that fit and I so desperately want to get back to that feeling. There was nothing in this world like it. And maybe one day I'll be fast enough to run with the likes of my friends Donna or Sherry.
Hey, a girl can dream, can't she?
As of 2 weeks post-op, I was cleared to lift weights. I thought that was a little too soon, so I waited until week 4. Now that I'm almost 6 weeks out, I have really started to try to lift smart so I can see progress without building too much muscle. I need to tone. And, frankly, I am a little worried about having bat wings. My legs have always been kind of muscular, and certainly now are becoming more defined. But my arms are quite another sad, sad story. So I've been lifting weights, alternating between upper and lower body. Yesterday, Gerald said he could feel the muscles in my shoulders. I didn't believe him until he showed me. LOL And even then, it sure was a foreign feel to my fingers. Another interesting thing I discovered this morning was soreness in my inner thighs. Yesterday was a lower body workout day and I did the adductor/abductor machine with increasing weights with each set. It's a technique described in Body-for-LIFE. This morning when I went to get out of my chair at work, I noticed I was sore, and it came as a surprise. It's not the kind of soreness where I was in pain, but the good kind where I could feel it and be mindful that I had exercised.
All this really does surprise and amaze me. I can't wait to be down to 200 pounds! Because that's my goal for starting to run again. I ran the half marathon in 2001 and weighed 230 when I did. I want to be able to start out running at a lower weight than I've seen in the last 20 years and then go from there. I remember what it felt like to be that fit and I so desperately want to get back to that feeling. There was nothing in this world like it. And maybe one day I'll be fast enough to run with the likes of my friends Donna or Sherry.
Hey, a girl can dream, can't she?
Wednesday, March 4, 2009
Weigh-in Wednesday - 5 weeks out!
Not much to report here today. I weighed in this morning and I am down to 260.4. So that's -34 pounds since surgery and a total of 45 pounds over all. I'm kind of in a weird place right now. Everything I have either fits again or is way too big. But the next size down is not necessarily the right fit. So I guess I'm in between. It's strange, but I'll take it.
I suppose one exception to this rule is that I have a pair of stretch jeans in black from several years ago that I had taken in on the sides. They were originally size 20, but I'm guessing I got them down to near an 18. I wore them to work today. In fact, I had the 2nd part of my internal interview with our VP and I was sweating over it. I wore the top to my black linen suit that I wore last week. I took the skirt and was going to change into that to go meet with Ben. But Steph assured me I looked fine the way I was. So off I went in black top, black jeans and my kickin' black boots. I wore my awesome silver jewelry that everybody loves. I felt good. And confident. And isn't that what one needs to feel like when on an interview?
The meeting with Ben was easy and more like a really pleasant conversation. I enjoyed speaking to him. I thanked him for seeing me. And tomorrow I will send him a warm thank you note to follow up. Officially, decisions will be made and we'll be notified by the middle of next week. So, my friends, say a few more prayers..... I'll keep you posted!
I suppose one exception to this rule is that I have a pair of stretch jeans in black from several years ago that I had taken in on the sides. They were originally size 20, but I'm guessing I got them down to near an 18. I wore them to work today. In fact, I had the 2nd part of my internal interview with our VP and I was sweating over it. I wore the top to my black linen suit that I wore last week. I took the skirt and was going to change into that to go meet with Ben. But Steph assured me I looked fine the way I was. So off I went in black top, black jeans and my kickin' black boots. I wore my awesome silver jewelry that everybody loves. I felt good. And confident. And isn't that what one needs to feel like when on an interview?
The meeting with Ben was easy and more like a really pleasant conversation. I enjoyed speaking to him. I thanked him for seeing me. And tomorrow I will send him a warm thank you note to follow up. Officially, decisions will be made and we'll be notified by the middle of next week. So, my friends, say a few more prayers..... I'll keep you posted!
Sunday, March 1, 2009
Yesterday was my 1 mo. Surgiversary!
"Surgiversary" is what we call an anniversary in WLS terms. I woke up to a good ol' DS cleaning out, and weighed. A friend of mine from the DS board says we should weigh first thing in the morning, post DS poop, while naked, dehydrated and exhaling. So that's what I did. I weighed in at 262, so that's exactly 32 pounds since surgery, for a total of 43 pounds over all.
It's been a pretty quiet weekend. We went to mom's yesterday and that was nice, well, except for the rain and cold and general yuckiness of the weather. I took her some clothes that I'd gotten from a clothing swap that are not my style. Mom really appreciated them! We also stopped by and saw Adrianne and Todd yesterday. Just hung around and BS-ed for a while.
Today I didn't feel very good. Nothing bad, just not a lot of energy. So we've laid around all day except for the trip to the grocery store. I've been wrapped up in my Snuggie that Mom gave me for my birthday and another blanket. Did I mention that I am constantly cold since surgery? Geez! I've never known anything like this! Gerald also built a fire in the fireplace and it was nice. I could tell when it went out. I really do long for one of those days when it's sunny and 90 degrees and I can go lay in the sun by the pool and get warm! Kinda like a blue-tailed skink on the concrete sidewalk.
And since it's so gross outside, the least it could do is SNOW! I'd love to see one more before winter is gone. I hope we wake up to one in the morning.
It's been a pretty quiet weekend. We went to mom's yesterday and that was nice, well, except for the rain and cold and general yuckiness of the weather. I took her some clothes that I'd gotten from a clothing swap that are not my style. Mom really appreciated them! We also stopped by and saw Adrianne and Todd yesterday. Just hung around and BS-ed for a while.
Today I didn't feel very good. Nothing bad, just not a lot of energy. So we've laid around all day except for the trip to the grocery store. I've been wrapped up in my Snuggie that Mom gave me for my birthday and another blanket. Did I mention that I am constantly cold since surgery? Geez! I've never known anything like this! Gerald also built a fire in the fireplace and it was nice. I could tell when it went out. I really do long for one of those days when it's sunny and 90 degrees and I can go lay in the sun by the pool and get warm! Kinda like a blue-tailed skink on the concrete sidewalk.
And since it's so gross outside, the least it could do is SNOW! I'd love to see one more before winter is gone. I hope we wake up to one in the morning.
Friday, February 27, 2009
A New Old Interview Suit
Yesterday I had 2 different interviews. I know I haven't formally said it, but I am losing my job on March 13th. I am trying to be really, really positive about the opportunity to move into clinical research though. So no cryin' in my beer for me, although that technically is all I can do with it. The beer, that is.
Another wow for me was that I wore a tailored black linen suit that I've had for years and could no longer wear. It fit and I had room. I hope to use it much more in the near future because it hopefully will quickly become too big. I also wore pantyhose and all the other girlie undergarments and I felt totally ok. About 40 pounds ago, I felt like a sausage stuffed into a skin that was 2 sizes too small. Heck, I wouldn't have worn hose either. Just too uncomfortable.
And the interviews? I'd hate to jinx myself, but I think I brought my A game. I came away feeling that I could not have possibly done any better. I'll wait to declare that I hit it out of the park once I get an offer somewhere. But the true test will be next week when I meet with the VP of R&D. That's the one I'm really sweating.......
Well, off to the gym. At least mine doesn't play Oingo Boingo. No spinning me right round here.
Another wow for me was that I wore a tailored black linen suit that I've had for years and could no longer wear. It fit and I had room. I hope to use it much more in the near future because it hopefully will quickly become too big. I also wore pantyhose and all the other girlie undergarments and I felt totally ok. About 40 pounds ago, I felt like a sausage stuffed into a skin that was 2 sizes too small. Heck, I wouldn't have worn hose either. Just too uncomfortable.
And the interviews? I'd hate to jinx myself, but I think I brought my A game. I came away feeling that I could not have possibly done any better. I'll wait to declare that I hit it out of the park once I get an offer somewhere. But the true test will be next week when I meet with the VP of R&D. That's the one I'm really sweating.......
Well, off to the gym. At least mine doesn't play Oingo Boingo. No spinning me right round here.
Wednesday, February 25, 2009
4 weeks out today!
I can't believe that 4 weeks ago I was in a hospital room with my guts newly rearranged. I was groggy, but thankful to be alive and not in much pain. I was thankful to see Gerald's sweet handsome face! And thankful to be given this chance at a new life!
Since Wednesdays are weigh in days, I did weight this morning, although it was kind of a less dramatic thing than if I hadn't weighed on Sunday. I really need to put the scales away except for on Wednesdays. Anyway, I weighed in today at 264.6, so that so close to 30 pounds lost since surgery, I'm calling it! That makes 41 pounds overall.
I'm really pleased with my progress, though it seems a bit surreal to me at this point. People say that they see a difference. All I know is I'm sick of eating the way I have to and wish I could down a whole cheeseburger like in days of old. But I know my life will never be the same. And no point in whining about the food, because I know it will get better, eventually. Hey, I did eat the inside out of a beef meximelt from Taco Bell for lunch and it didn't hurt. Thank God for small miracles. I guess I need to remind myself of how far I have come in 4 weeks. Never have I lost 30 pounds (or even 41 pounds) so effortlessly. I mean, food tastes weird, so I suppose it's at least we get the reward of rapid weight loss. Sorry for the rant. I'm done now. I guess I just have to keep reminding myself that I didn't wake up skinny.
In other wows..... not only am I wearing clothes of my own that I had outgrown a while ago, I am having other wows along the way. As I posted yesterday, we went to Memorial Hall at UNC to see the Neville Bros. and Dr. John last night for Mardi Gras. Well, when I sat in the seat, I had extra room!!! It was another wow that snuck up on me when I wasn't looking! In fact, I had room in the seat to move around and I dropped something on the floor and could bend all the way over my belly and pick it up from the floor without cutting off the air to my lungs!!! Now I wonder if I should keep a spreadsheet with all my wows in it. But that'd be just a little too anal, wouldn't it?
Hope today is a wonderful one!
Since Wednesdays are weigh in days, I did weight this morning, although it was kind of a less dramatic thing than if I hadn't weighed on Sunday. I really need to put the scales away except for on Wednesdays. Anyway, I weighed in today at 264.6, so that so close to 30 pounds lost since surgery, I'm calling it! That makes 41 pounds overall.
I'm really pleased with my progress, though it seems a bit surreal to me at this point. People say that they see a difference. All I know is I'm sick of eating the way I have to and wish I could down a whole cheeseburger like in days of old. But I know my life will never be the same. And no point in whining about the food, because I know it will get better, eventually. Hey, I did eat the inside out of a beef meximelt from Taco Bell for lunch and it didn't hurt. Thank God for small miracles. I guess I need to remind myself of how far I have come in 4 weeks. Never have I lost 30 pounds (or even 41 pounds) so effortlessly. I mean, food tastes weird, so I suppose it's at least we get the reward of rapid weight loss. Sorry for the rant. I'm done now. I guess I just have to keep reminding myself that I didn't wake up skinny.
In other wows..... not only am I wearing clothes of my own that I had outgrown a while ago, I am having other wows along the way. As I posted yesterday, we went to Memorial Hall at UNC to see the Neville Bros. and Dr. John last night for Mardi Gras. Well, when I sat in the seat, I had extra room!!! It was another wow that snuck up on me when I wasn't looking! In fact, I had room in the seat to move around and I dropped something on the floor and could bend all the way over my belly and pick it up from the floor without cutting off the air to my lungs!!! Now I wonder if I should keep a spreadsheet with all my wows in it. But that'd be just a little too anal, wouldn't it?
Hope today is a wonderful one!
Tuesday, February 24, 2009
Today is my Birthday!
I'm officially 39 today. Well, I will be at 4:44 p.m. It's going to be a good day I think. I woke up feeling ok, but could only get down half a scrambled egg. But no matter. I'm going to make it a great day. And hey, today is also Fat Tuesday! I always love those years where my birthday falls on Fat Tuesday. One of these years I'm going to spend my b-day in New Orleans celebrating Mardi Gras!
So tonight, Gerald and I have tickets to see the Neville Brothers with Dr. John at Memorial Hall at UNC - for Mardi Gras, no doubt! I'm actually looking forward to it! I think it will be fun to get out and do something. And these days, going out and doing something can't be going out to eat. I'm going to give that more time so that when we do go out to eat, I will be able to enjoy it!
So tonight, Gerald and I have tickets to see the Neville Brothers with Dr. John at Memorial Hall at UNC - for Mardi Gras, no doubt! I'm actually looking forward to it! I think it will be fun to get out and do something. And these days, going out and doing something can't be going out to eat. I'm going to give that more time so that when we do go out to eat, I will be able to enjoy it!
Sunday, February 22, 2009
Day 25 - Minus 39 pounds!
Gerald was generous enough to take pictures today and do the pictorial montage you see below. It shows my pre-op picture and me today. I guess I don't smile very big, but maybe it will get better as I go. I'm certainly not frowning like I was pre-op though!
We also took measurements today. I know it's not my 1 month surgiversary yet, but my pre-op measurements were done on Jan. 19th. So these are about 1 month and 2 days out - especially since I'm guessing that my measurements didn't change appreciable before surgery. I've lost 21.75 inches since surgery! WOW. Although it seems like my rear end isn't budging, I am losing all over according to the tape measure. Most notably, I lost 1.25" from my neck, 2.5" from my chest, 1" from my bust (Yay - they're not leaving as fast as I had thought they might!), 3" from my waist, and 3.75" from my hips. I'm really glad to see the numbers.
But one thing that was cool was that today I wore a jacket to church that I hadn't had on in a couple of years. It was so tight across my boobs that it looked bad and it wouldn't even button over my hips at all. Well, today it fit and was so comfortable! It's wool, too, so it was nice and warm for church. Have I mentioned that I am constantly freezing all the time? That is REALLY a new one on me! Crazy, I tell ya!!
I will be weighing again on Wednesday since my "official" weigh day is Wednesdays. We'll see how much more I manage to lose before my 1 mo. check-up with Dr. Smith. My check-up with him will be Monday, March 3rd. Here's hoping he's pleased with my progress!
We also took measurements today. I know it's not my 1 month surgiversary yet, but my pre-op measurements were done on Jan. 19th. So these are about 1 month and 2 days out - especially since I'm guessing that my measurements didn't change appreciable before surgery. I've lost 21.75 inches since surgery! WOW. Although it seems like my rear end isn't budging, I am losing all over according to the tape measure. Most notably, I lost 1.25" from my neck, 2.5" from my chest, 1" from my bust (Yay - they're not leaving as fast as I had thought they might!), 3" from my waist, and 3.75" from my hips. I'm really glad to see the numbers.
But one thing that was cool was that today I wore a jacket to church that I hadn't had on in a couple of years. It was so tight across my boobs that it looked bad and it wouldn't even button over my hips at all. Well, today it fit and was so comfortable! It's wool, too, so it was nice and warm for church. Have I mentioned that I am constantly freezing all the time? That is REALLY a new one on me! Crazy, I tell ya!!
I will be weighing again on Wednesday since my "official" weigh day is Wednesdays. We'll see how much more I manage to lose before my 1 mo. check-up with Dr. Smith. My check-up with him will be Monday, March 3rd. Here's hoping he's pleased with my progress!
Wednesday, February 11, 2009
2 Weeks Post-op - 34 POUNDS Lost!!
I swear I never thought I'd feel as good as I do. The first few days were rough once the plumbing started working again. That is sorting it self out, but honestly, now nothing tastes good. I miss tomatoes soooo much! Can't have them until week 6. Darn! Even mayo tastes sweet, and I hate it. I want things to taste normal. I never craved sweets before anyway, so now I don't want stuff that usually has a tart or salty taste to taste sweet. And everything leaves the worst aftertaste. I've been told it gets better - I really am holding out hope!
Now, on to the good news - ok, so I gave it away in the title of the post! Gerald and I have been faithfully going to the gym each day at lunch (I'm enjoying it while I can, knowing next week we'll have to go before work). I think I am reaping some of the benefits now. I can already drive and I have not had any pain meds since Sunday night. Driving does not bother the tummy either. But the best news is that in 14 days, I have lost 23 POUNDS!! I have lost a total of 34 from Christmas when I received my approval letter. So, 34 POUNDS!!! I find it so hard to believe, as I'd rather have woke up skinny, but then I know that's not possible. I am enjoying the ride, as they say. I had toyed with not posting my actual weight, but what the heck. I'm not going to be fat anymore, so I don't care who knows. I weighed in before surgery at 294.4 and this morning my scales said 271.8. I can't believe I'll be in the 260s in another 2 pounds. Once I get to the 250s, I will be in territory that I haven't seen since 2001 when I trained for and ran the half marathon with Karen - I was 230 then. (Honestly, it seems so unreal at times.) Oh, and when I hit the magic 200 pound mark, I'm going to start running again. G and I are planning to run the Mardi Gras 1/2 Marathon next February in NOLA! He's psyched, and frankly, so am I! I just can't believe I will be able to do the next one without carrying another person on my back.
I feel so blessed!
I promise to update soon with details and funny stories about the day of surgery, and beyond while in the hospital.
Now, on to the good news - ok, so I gave it away in the title of the post! Gerald and I have been faithfully going to the gym each day at lunch (I'm enjoying it while I can, knowing next week we'll have to go before work). I think I am reaping some of the benefits now. I can already drive and I have not had any pain meds since Sunday night. Driving does not bother the tummy either. But the best news is that in 14 days, I have lost 23 POUNDS!! I have lost a total of 34 from Christmas when I received my approval letter. So, 34 POUNDS!!! I find it so hard to believe, as I'd rather have woke up skinny, but then I know that's not possible. I am enjoying the ride, as they say. I had toyed with not posting my actual weight, but what the heck. I'm not going to be fat anymore, so I don't care who knows. I weighed in before surgery at 294.4 and this morning my scales said 271.8. I can't believe I'll be in the 260s in another 2 pounds. Once I get to the 250s, I will be in territory that I haven't seen since 2001 when I trained for and ran the half marathon with Karen - I was 230 then. (Honestly, it seems so unreal at times.) Oh, and when I hit the magic 200 pound mark, I'm going to start running again. G and I are planning to run the Mardi Gras 1/2 Marathon next February in NOLA! He's psyched, and frankly, so am I! I just can't believe I will be able to do the next one without carrying another person on my back.
I feel so blessed!
I promise to update soon with details and funny stories about the day of surgery, and beyond while in the hospital.
So Thankful to be home!
Well, it's a little late, but we got home last Thursday around 6:30-ish. That was the god-awfullest long ride home ever! We had to stop every 45 minutes so I could get out and walk. All I wanted to do was sleep. But I walked faithfully. I tried to eat some KFC mashed taters and gravy, but they were too thick and got stuck. What an awful feeling. It feels like there a brick in my chest and nothing I do will help it, except to be quiet and still and wait for it to pass. This time, I did walk around the car some while we were stopped and it helped some. Not fun, let me tell you.
I know I'm behind here, but I promise to do better at updating. I've been feeling pretty good, but I always get tired. I know this too shall pass.
I know I'm behind here, but I promise to do better at updating. I've been feeling pretty good, but I always get tired. I know this too shall pass.
Saturday, January 31, 2009
Saturday 10:35 AM
Dr. Smith just stopped in. Angela is doing fine and he's writing the discharge papers, so we'll be headed back to the hotel this afternoon.
She has a follow-up appointment Thursday at 9:30 AM, and then we'll be headed back to Durham.
She has a follow-up appointment Thursday at 9:30 AM, and then we'll be headed back to Durham.
Friday, January 30, 2009
Friday noon
Sorry for not updating sooner. Angela is doing great! She's up and walking the hallways and working on taking in enough fluids. There's a constant stream of nurses and techs coming in and out to check on her progress and they all say she's doing well, and progressing right on schedule. She'll probably be discharged from the hospital tomorrow afternoon.
She says to tell everyone that she's not up to typing right now but she is up for phone calls. Her cell phone is charged up, so give her a ring.
She says to tell everyone that she's not up to typing right now but she is up for phone calls. Her cell phone is charged up, so give her a ring.
Wednesday, January 28, 2009
3:15 PM
We're in a room! Angela is sleeping right now but she woke up and smiled when I came in. She's pretty sore and still drowsy from pain meds and anesthesia after-effects, but the nurse says she'll be up and walking tonight.
12:40 AM
At 10:00 the nurse called to say everything was going fine. I haven't had an update since then. I hope everything is still going well.
8:30 AM
They've taken Angela to the O.R and I'm settling in to the waiting room for a long wait. The nurse said it will take a half hour to prep her for surgery and about four hours for the actual procedure. They gave me a pager and said I'll get periodic updates.
Wed. 6:30 am
We're here in the pre-op area. Angela has changed into a hospital gown and the nurse will be here soon to get her ready to go.
Tuesday, January 27, 2009
Tuesday 1/27 12:38 PM
Gerald here, in the waiting room of the medical imaging department of Wellstone hospital. Angela is having her PIC line installed. Then it's back to the hotel, where at 2:00 PM she starts bowel prep.
Monday, January 26, 2009
Last Meal
Starting Monday, Angela is on a liquid diet leading up to Duodenal Switch surgery on Wednesday. And she'll be on liquids for a few weeks after the surgery.
For her last meal, we went to Copeland's. She had shrimp etouffe' and I had crab stuffed catfish. It was delicious.
For her last meal, we went to Copeland's. She had shrimp etouffe' and I had crab stuffed catfish. It was delicious.
Brunch with Karlene
Karlene was the appeals specialist I hired to help me with appeals for surgery. She used to work for Dr. Smith. I never dreamed while she was doing all these appeals that she would turn out to be an angel in my life, and someone I plan to have in my life for a long time to come. She helped me in more ways than just getting my insurance denial overturned. This journey has already brought such wonderful new friends into my life - I am SO grateful.
Monday, January 12, 2009
Ignore this post
Hi. Gerald here, getting ready for the big day. This post is just to make sure everything is set up properly so I can post to the blog from my cell phone. You're reading this, so it must have worked.
Sunday, January 11, 2009
17 Days and counting....
First, let me apologize for the random order of my thoughts as I get this set up and get ready for surgery in just 17 short days. I find it completely incomprehensible that just 2 weeks ago, I was still wondering and waiting for the final word from BCBS of NC.
Now, for a little history...... I thought long and hard about WLS some 4-5 years ago. I had met several people who'd had Roux-en-Y gastric bypass and were doing quite well. At the time, I decided that I couldn't live without the ability to drink alcohol after asking some pointed questions about day-to-day life with that form of surgery. So back to Weight Watchers I went, and yet another attempt to lose more than 20 pounds. I battled it hard, and stayed at it for over 2 years in WW, only to lose a grand total of 29 pounds. I kept it off for a while, but it gradually crept back on.
Fast forward to Summer 2007. I saw an acquaintance at a cookout and she looked as if she had literally melted away! Bless her, Kris told me all I wanted to know and then some about this wonderful surgery of which I knew nothing - called the Duodenal Switch, or DS for short. Literally, I played 20 questions that turned into more like 200! And she was SO gracious to entertain all my stupid questions of minutiae. (Thank you, Kris, for changing my life!! I hope you one day know what an angel you have been!) I left there with the name of her surgeon and his web address. So the research and the journey began....
I started out with her surgeon, Dr. Hazem Elariny, in Vienna, VA. I really like Dr. Elariny, and he is a great surgeon. I just could not afford his fees, so I sought and found Dr. Dennis Smith, Jr. in Marietta, GA. I began with his office in March 2008, after waiting on a change of insurance at my old company and then a change of jobs to yet another insurance. I did all the required tests for both Dr. Smith and BCBS, and we filed for approval in early May. I was denied. Flat-out denied. I'll always remember standing in Logan Airport, getting the news and being so heartsick and yet livid at the same time. Oh no, the fight was on. They just didn't know I have the tenacity of a bulldog and was not about to give up and go away!
So I hired an ERISA appeals specialist who handled my appeals for me. Karlene Dittrich is an angel and a hellion all rolled into one!! I love her SO much, and I have never met her face-to-face. But you can bet that when I go to GA in 11 days, I will get to meet her and hug her neck!!! Karlene filed appeals and fought with insurance through 2 appeals. But her bigger job was to talk me down from the ledge as often as I'd climb up there! Which was often, let me tell you. She was the one person who told me time and again that "Patience and Persistence make you POWERFUL!" And now I'm a believer. For 2nd appeal, I got letters of support from my spine doc (I ruptured yet another lumbar disc in March 2008) and the PA of my orthopedic surgeon who scoped my right shoulder in October 2007. She filed that appeal the week before Christmas. I was sure it would be mid-January before I'd hear anything and that surely I would have to go before the grievance panel at BCBS to plead my case. So imagine my surprise when I got the approval letter in the mail on December 30th! It was approved on Christmas Eve, and once I stopped hyper-ventilating, screaming, and crying, I realized what a wonderful Christmas gift I had indeed been given.
Now, for a little history...... I thought long and hard about WLS some 4-5 years ago. I had met several people who'd had Roux-en-Y gastric bypass and were doing quite well. At the time, I decided that I couldn't live without the ability to drink alcohol after asking some pointed questions about day-to-day life with that form of surgery. So back to Weight Watchers I went, and yet another attempt to lose more than 20 pounds. I battled it hard, and stayed at it for over 2 years in WW, only to lose a grand total of 29 pounds. I kept it off for a while, but it gradually crept back on.
Fast forward to Summer 2007. I saw an acquaintance at a cookout and she looked as if she had literally melted away! Bless her, Kris told me all I wanted to know and then some about this wonderful surgery of which I knew nothing - called the Duodenal Switch, or DS for short. Literally, I played 20 questions that turned into more like 200! And she was SO gracious to entertain all my stupid questions of minutiae. (Thank you, Kris, for changing my life!! I hope you one day know what an angel you have been!) I left there with the name of her surgeon and his web address. So the research and the journey began....
I started out with her surgeon, Dr. Hazem Elariny, in Vienna, VA. I really like Dr. Elariny, and he is a great surgeon. I just could not afford his fees, so I sought and found Dr. Dennis Smith, Jr. in Marietta, GA. I began with his office in March 2008, after waiting on a change of insurance at my old company and then a change of jobs to yet another insurance. I did all the required tests for both Dr. Smith and BCBS, and we filed for approval in early May. I was denied. Flat-out denied. I'll always remember standing in Logan Airport, getting the news and being so heartsick and yet livid at the same time. Oh no, the fight was on. They just didn't know I have the tenacity of a bulldog and was not about to give up and go away!
So I hired an ERISA appeals specialist who handled my appeals for me. Karlene Dittrich is an angel and a hellion all rolled into one!! I love her SO much, and I have never met her face-to-face. But you can bet that when I go to GA in 11 days, I will get to meet her and hug her neck!!! Karlene filed appeals and fought with insurance through 2 appeals. But her bigger job was to talk me down from the ledge as often as I'd climb up there! Which was often, let me tell you. She was the one person who told me time and again that "Patience and Persistence make you POWERFUL!" And now I'm a believer. For 2nd appeal, I got letters of support from my spine doc (I ruptured yet another lumbar disc in March 2008) and the PA of my orthopedic surgeon who scoped my right shoulder in October 2007. She filed that appeal the week before Christmas. I was sure it would be mid-January before I'd hear anything and that surely I would have to go before the grievance panel at BCBS to plead my case. So imagine my surprise when I got the approval letter in the mail on December 30th! It was approved on Christmas Eve, and once I stopped hyper-ventilating, screaming, and crying, I realized what a wonderful Christmas gift I had indeed been given.
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